Neutralize conflicts

 Melody Beattie - more language of letting go. 

Unless you want a fight or an argument, don't give anything to push against. 

Here is a key to harmonizing with people who are upset or have a point of view different from your own. Stay so relaxed when you talk to them that you allow yourself to empathize with how they think and feel. THat doesn't mean that you give in to peoples every whim. It means, instead, that you are so clear and focused that you can genuinely let other people be who they are. 

It's both naive and egotistical to think that everyone thinks and feels the same as us. It's ridiculous to believe that everyone will agree with our point of view. One of the true signs of a person who is growing consciousness is that he or she recognizes that each person has individual motives , desires and feelings. 

Instead of meeting a verbal attack with a verbal counter attack you respond first by coming around to your attackers point of view, seeing the situation from his or her viewpoint. 

BLEND to deal with verbal confrontations in our daily lives. The response, whether physical or verbal, is quite disarming, leaving the attacker with no target to focus on. It's a means by which you can multiply your options in responding to any kind of attack. If the person espousing his or her point of view is just trying to get us to react or has no desire for reconciliation, we can still neutralize the conflict by staying relaxed, letting the other person be and responding by saying, "hmmm." It's a polite way of saying, "whatever" when expressing your disagreement would only lead to a senseless fight. At the least, you'll become a great conversationalist, a respectable art to be acquired. At best, you'll bring about peace in your corner of the world.