You're not alone - CPTSD

    There are places in out live that we're called to go alone. People can surround us, call us and offer support. But the journey we're about to take is soley and uniquely ours, and ours alone. 

    Slowly, as we walk this path that life has thrust us on, we begin to see the outline of a few faces - way out in the distance, waving to us, cheering us on. As we continue along the path, the faces and forms fill in. Before long, we see that we're in the midst of a large, large group. Where did all htese people come from? We wonder. I THOUGHT I WAS ALONE.

    No matter what path you're on, others have walked it before you, and some will follow you there. Each step you take is uniquely yours, but you are never, never alone. 

   While many experieces are isolated and uniquely ours, we're simultaneously part of a collective force. What we go through and what we do matters. Sometimes much more than we know. 

    So lets revisit discussion about CPTSD. 

I'd like to start with the definition of CPTSD.

    CPTSD is a more severe form of post traumatic stress disorder. It is outlined from this better known trauma syndrom by five of it's most troublesome symtoms:

• Emotional Flashbacks
• Toxic-Shame
• Self-abandonment
• A viscious inner critic
• Social Anxiety        

I have emotional flashbacks of many kinds. Sometimes its a smell, a song, an item, a nightmare. Then suddenly this stream of lightbulbs go off and vivid memories and flashbacks appear. 

       Emotional flashbacks are the most intense, most noticeable charachteristics of cptsd. Survivors...victims of traumatizing abandonment are extremely susceptability to painful emotionsl flashbacks, which unlike ptsd do not typically have a visual component. 

    These are sudden, unexpected and often prolonged regressions to the overwhelming feeling. States of being abused

    I give myself daily reminders and affirmations that I write on an index card and have taped to my closet wall. They help me retrigger my brain when these emotional flashbacks put my mind in a foggy place. I hope they help for you to. 

    YOUR BRAIN ON TRAUMA:

• Suspicious and untrusting
• negative and pessimistic
• addictive
• self sabotaging
• scattered and distracted
• demotivated and drained of energy
• self critical
• judgemental of yourself and others
• emotionally cut off

REMIND YOURSELF:

This is not who you are!

This is not who you want to be!

Retrain your mind!

Take personal inventory!

Meditate!

Grieve and let go!

NEVERTHELESS, PERSIST!